Plus he'd look awful in a white dress. [Video]

[trustycrowbar]

So, that dragon-thing in front of the labs? Looks like it's just hungry. At first I thought it would fly off and hunt if that were the case, but it is a DRAGON after all. It's kind of a thing of theirs to demand tribute in the form of food.

Anyone have a clue what a seventeen-ton dragon would eat? The only things I can think of that are usually dragon food are cattle and virgins...

I'd suggest we offer Karkat, but he'd probably just give the thing indigestion. Anyone else have any ideas?

Comments

[nomen_est_numen]

"If you need any help obtaining said sacrifice...."

... Says the bird bristling with knives.

[trustycrowbar]

Gk-- No, that, uh... probably won't be necessary, Shen. Let's try to find a solution where no one gets hurt first.

[nomen_est_numen]

"Oh, very well." He puts the knives away. Goodness. Soon enough, however, he's back to his usual smooth, somewhat lofty self. "Probably just as easy to do without the knives."

[trustycrowbar]

[Christ, he's turned into one vicious bird after that kung-fu synaptic dump...]

I'll... keep you posted.

[nomen_est_numen]

Headtilt. "Is something wrong?"

[trustycrowbar]

Huh? No, it's nothi-- nngh. [Tact circuits: disengaged.]

...It just occurred to me that you wouldn't have volunteered a service like that so quickly two weeks ago.

[nomen_est_numen]

"Two weeks ago I didn't know Karkat as well as I do now." A pause. "Still... I think you're right," he finishes, sounding as though he were coming to a realisation. "I think I have become more violent." Here, he grows thoughtful. "I wonder what that says about my past. I wonder if I want to know what it says about my past...."

[trustycrowbar]

Hey, don't worry about it. I'm sure everyone here has some stuff in their past they're not sure if they want to know about... But I was just kidding about Karkat. Mostly.

[nomen_est_numen]

"I'll tread carefully around any new memories I regain...." Is Shen worried? Yes. Yes, he is. He shakes it off, however, and offers a half-smile. "Maybe that's for the best. He'd look laughable in a white gown anyway."

[trustycrowbar]

[There's a second of pure blank staring before Gordon sputters into a huge laugh that leans him off-camera.]

AAAHAHAHAH, oh jeezus! I have this mental image now of him glaring hatred at the entire world and everyone in it, in this [snrk] gossamer gown with flowers on his horns--

[He can't even finish the sentence and he's reduced to a snickering mirth-infused heap draped over the desk.]

[nomen_est_numen]

Shen snickers and chortles. "You do realise this must be done, now. And pictures must be taken."

[faithful_kitsune]

Ah, excuse me! I believe I have something I would like to try! It may be a stretch, but you never know!

[trustycrowbar]

[His eyebrows climb.] You do? What?

[faithful_kitsune]

These delightful pastries!

*She holds up a bag.*

These strange machines appeared recently, you see, and I've discovered they make most wonderful treats! Ky thinks maybe the snake might like them as well! It is a far shot, but it is better than nothing, right?

[trustycrowbar]

You're going to offer it... pastries?

[He thinks back. Yeah, he did see her wafting around those weird machines before... They appeared right around the time that dragon did. Hm.]

You know, it WAS snuffling at Shen like it thought he had something particular. It's obviously looking for something. Probably worth a shot!

[faithful_kitsune]

Excellent! I've been working on some already! Do you think I should make a few more just to be safe?

*...and maybe have some surplus for herself?*

[trustycrowbar]

[If you listen hard enough, you can actually hear the dormant starving-grad-student impulse perk up.]

As many as you can manage! That dragon's got to have a big appetite, and even if he doesn't want them I'm sure you can find SOMEONE to give them to.

[faithful_kitsune]

I'm sure, I'm sure.

*If she doesn't eat them first. Stuff's almost as good as fried tofu.*

[video]

[canthandleacape]

Got a lot of experience with dragons?

[trustycrowbar]

...No, just what I observed watching it and what I remember reading about.

[canthandleacape]

Hey, that's more than I've got. I probably wouldn't have thought to call it a dragon at all unless somebody else did first.

[trustycrowbar]

[Gordon blinks a moment, unsure how to respond. Was Booster... agreeing with him on something?]

Uh, yeah. Well hell, there's probably a better explanation somewhere but it seems that thing's from a world that none of us are from. Best I can figure? Dragon. Mabye Doctor Van Richden can give a better answer... For what it's worth, I can joke but I really hope we don't have to feed that thing anything that can talk. Call me squeamish like that.

Hey... I know you guys are busy, but Jay-ell probably has the best chance of moving that thing. Any chance that maybe...?

[canthandleacape]

We're already keeping an eye on it, just in case it starts doing something besides sitting there. But that's it. I don't want to risk making it mad and getting the Labs wrecked in the process.

[trustycrowbar]

Mgh. Damn, you've got a point there... Okay. Let me see what we can do that won't freak it out.

[He's not sure which is stranger: the fact that he feels responsible for keeping everyone and everything intact right alongside the confirmed superhero, or the fact that he's honestly believing he can accomplish something that the freakin' Justice League cannot.]

[...whatever. He's not going to think about it. He's just going to do it.]

[has_a_blog]

No wait, let's not dismiss this Karkat idea out of hand.

[trustycrowbar]

[Trying not to lose it laughing like he did with Shen. It's working... sort of.]

It sounds like a win-win situation, yeah, but do YOU want to try to stuff him into a white sacrificial gown? There's awkward connotations all around, there. Plus he'd [snrk] he'd probably be a biter.

[has_a_blog]

My future self knew how to freeze people in time, I think. That'd be handy for this.

But I don't know how to do that shit yet, so I'm sure has shit not volunteering.

[trustycrowbar]

I'm sure as hell not going to do it either. Shen, uh... offered to help, but I said I'd keep him posted. He also suggested taking pictures.

I'm not sure how I feel about that.

[has_a_blog]

Know what was awesome? Everything before now when I didn't know that.