High Scores and Low Attention Spans

[trustycrowbar]

[Acton]

[Anyone who happens into the library will find a large research table along the windows completely coated in newspapers, magazines, atlases and books on local history, and sprawled in a chair before all of it is a thin, bespectacled young man in an orange sweater and faded jeans who is definitely not reading any of them at the moment. Gordon growls quietly as he plucks off his glasses and presses the heels of his hands into his eyes.]

Rrrgh, dammit... Nothing. What the hell? You'd think SOMETHING would start looking familiar, but no, I may as well be reading these things in Russian or something.

[He lowers his hands and stares at the ceiling for a moment.]

...I don't speak Russian, do I? Christ, that statement's going to sound really stupid in hindsight if I do.

[A few more futile and frustrating hours later, he's out of the library and at a place where he can blow off some steam; a bar near the Ermis Apartments.]

AHAHAHAH, GOTCHA! Who's the predating subspecies NOW, bitch?! Ohohoh what's this? More of those fat fucks that blow up into a dozen little ones! Allow me to cut your gestation time short! EAT GRENADES!

[His beer sits forgotten on a nearby table while he manically fires a little plastic gun at the screen of one of those violent zombie-saturated video games that occasionally find themselves in bars. He's gleefully swearing up a storm, and it's worth mentioning that for a high-difficulty quarter-muncher it has yet to actually see a game-over screen.]

Comments

[trustycrowbar]

Man, what's YOUR problem? Don't tell me you've never-- [Then he glances over at the troll and stares for a half-second. You would too if it were the first one you've ever seen in your life.]

What the hell--GAH! [Back to the game, those seconds have cost him and the horde is attacking!] Oh shit oh shit oh shi--AAUGH!

[Game over. He tosses the gun on the console with a growl and grabs his beer.] Thanks a lot, freakazoid. Ngh, that was the last level too.

[hatefriendleader]

Hahahahaha, way to go. It's called pausing the fucking game you douche.

[trustycrowbar]

[He scowls at the troll.] Those games don't even freaking HAVE pause buttons! D'ya spend that much time with your head up your ass because those horns poke your prostate, or what?

[hatefriendleader]

In which case the fault lies with your species for being retarded enough to design games without pause buttons. Checkmate. Thanks for playing, don't let the threshold oscillator hit you on the way out!