Lord Shen (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
nomen_est_numen) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
anemoi2012-03-26 07:41 pm
nomen_est_numen) wrote in anemoi2012-03-26 07:41 pm
Entry tags:
[video]
The screen shows... what looks like some kind of ranch behind a familiar Peacock. Said Peacock is clad in not only his usual robes but a giant canvas jacket and a hat.
"Hullo, everyone. I discovered something noteworthy at to-day's job." The camera pans to the side and up, showing a sign reading HONEST CID'S CHOCOBO RANCH AND COMPUTER REPAIR. Then it pans down a little, displaying footage of rather a lot of birds a bit larger than he is. Then it pans back to Shen. "These animals are called 'Chocobos' and I'm told they tolerate being ridden by humans, rather like horses and, even more interestingly, I'm told they are able to scare off monsters, though I haven't gotten anything more specific than that, yet. I thought this might be of interest to the next anemoi-hunting expedi--" He's broken off as one of the Chocobos has sauntered right up to him and now headbutts his shoulder in a decidedly friendly manner.
"Ah-eh... they're... friendly...." The Chocobo headbutts him again, and then snuggles him.
"Hooo-eee," a voice behind Shen exclaims. "Whah, Ah think she lahkes yew, there, Sean!"
"Shen. My name is Sh--DO YOU MIND!?" The Chocobo has now worked its head under his jacket and is attempting to get into his robes.
"Yew'd better be keerful, it's matin' season, yanno!" the rancher chortles. The Chocobo continues attempting to molest Shen, to his increasingly frantic protests. Eventually the rancher, a hayseed-looking human, wanders over and tugs at the Chocobo's feather crest, distracting her. "Okay, okay, Beulah, Ah know he's purteh, but he's got work ta dew. G'wan, git!" He gives her a light swat and she wanders off, emitting a sharp WARK! as she goes.
Shen is ruffled and humiliated and the rancher thinks that's the funniest damn thing he's seen all day.
"Hey, whyncher tell them freinds'a yewrs ta come on down! Get half-off a Chocobo with ev'ry compewter repair!"
"Hullo, everyone. I discovered something noteworthy at to-day's job." The camera pans to the side and up, showing a sign reading HONEST CID'S CHOCOBO RANCH AND COMPUTER REPAIR. Then it pans down a little, displaying footage of rather a lot of birds a bit larger than he is. Then it pans back to Shen. "These animals are called 'Chocobos' and I'm told they tolerate being ridden by humans, rather like horses and, even more interestingly, I'm told they are able to scare off monsters, though I haven't gotten anything more specific than that, yet. I thought this might be of interest to the next anemoi-hunting expedi--" He's broken off as one of the Chocobos has sauntered right up to him and now headbutts his shoulder in a decidedly friendly manner.
"Ah-eh... they're... friendly...." The Chocobo headbutts him again, and then snuggles him.
"Hooo-eee," a voice behind Shen exclaims. "Whah, Ah think she lahkes yew, there, Sean!"
"Shen. My name is Sh--DO YOU MIND!?" The Chocobo has now worked its head under his jacket and is attempting to get into his robes.
"Yew'd better be keerful, it's matin' season, yanno!" the rancher chortles. The Chocobo continues attempting to molest Shen, to his increasingly frantic protests. Eventually the rancher, a hayseed-looking human, wanders over and tugs at the Chocobo's feather crest, distracting her. "Okay, okay, Beulah, Ah know he's purteh, but he's got work ta dew. G'wan, git!" He gives her a light swat and she wanders off, emitting a sharp WARK! as she goes.
Shen is ruffled and humiliated and the rancher thinks that's the funniest damn thing he's seen all day.
"Hey, whyncher tell them freinds'a yewrs ta come on down! Get half-off a Chocobo with ev'ry compewter repair!"
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Guess you're not into farm girls, eh Shen--
[Midway through it's bulldozed by a fresh surge of laughter. You are never living this down, featherduster. Ever.]
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chick fight.
He attempts to disentagle himself from the furious avians.
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Whoa hey, are you--snrk--are you all right?
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"Shen. It's Shen, I keep telling y--" he runs a wing over his face. "Never mind. I'll try to stay away from them."
He looks at the phone. "Ask again in another couple hours...."
Another female decides to forego any pussyfooting around and leaps at him. She would have knocked him over had he not dodged. She squawks indignantly. So does he. He vanishes offscreen. In another instant, he's running for his dignity across the field, a small crowd of squawking, flapping birds chasing after him and the rancher shouting at the birds to git back here an stop chasin mah employees! which begs the question as to how many other avians he's employed. He turns the garden hose on the birds and Shen runs the other way.
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...You know, 's a good thing humans don't have to go through that every spring. We'd never gotten our asses out of the caves otherwise.
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And just as he's managed to outrun the females, the males get in on the act. One of them leaps at him claws first and it's only his martial-arts training that ensures he dodges unscathed. Others leap or charge and the next thing he knows, he's fighting off a crowd of them.
"Yew better haghtail it fer the haowse, Sheen, they's lookin ta kill yew!" the rancher shouts.
Shen grabs the phone and takes off in a wild flapping of wings--the next thing anyone knows, he's on the roof. The Chocobos, meanwhile, are still fighting amongst themselves.
"I'm beginning to think I'd best not come back here to-morrow," he pants.
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[It's not clear whether he's actually joking or not.]
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