anemoi | (no subject)

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[ACTION; HIGH ON THE BUILDINGS OF ANEMOI]

*"Oi! Stop right there!"

"Bwa ha ha ha ha! There's no stopping me! I, the Soda Popper, will see this city drown!

"The Soda Popper? ...you're kidding me, right?"

"Don't take me so lightly, you green and white fool! Taste my fizzy destruction!"

*shakeshakeshake FZZZZZZZPLASH*

"Ha ha ha! See how my special soda erodes your armor? Now it's only a matter of time before it eats into your flesh!"

"..."

[VIDEO]

*Kotetsu is in the foreground, with a brown liquid dripping from him. Behind him, a somewhat overweight pimply kid lies unconscious, with a truly ridiculous amound of soda spilling out from a broken container on his back.*

Got another friggin' idiot up here. Was spraying soda on the cars below and cackling about causing chaos or something. What's making all these weirdos come outta the woodwork lately?

...And anybody got a towel?

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Office supplies, inchworm... magic net? And soda. Yeah, it's not even worth trying to find a common thread there. It sounds like they turned the loony bin upside down and shook everyone out.

Seriously! What'd that clown guy do, spike the water or something? Geez!

...

[Huh.]

He... he just might have. Maybe not the water, but d'you notice that this lame villain crime wave happened to start exactly after that transmission of his? I may be looking for something that isn't there, but the fact that all these people got supervillain-stupid at once can't be a coincidence. Maybe he did something to them...

...

Oi, hang on a sec.

*He hangs up for a bit. Then reconnects.*

Okay, Booster, you there? You gotta hear what Gordon just said.

Unless this involves the phrase "free coffee delivery 24/7", I'm not sure I want to hear it.

[He's listening.]

Nope, in fact this is probably gonna harsh your caffeine buzz something fierce.

The Joker. You said you're familiar with how he operates. This wave of nutty villains started right after his transmission, right? Is there some way he can... change the way people act somehow? You established these guys you're fighting lately aren't exactly pros. They seem more like ordinary people who've been brainwashed or hit with a weird-ass spell or something.

That sound like something in The Joker's MO, Booster? We heard anything from the villains at all yet?

[Booster thinks for a while before answering.]

It... could be the Joker's work. He's not magic, so we can rule that out, but it could definitely be a more scientific method of brainwashing. And a few of the guys we've dragged in were already reported missing, so that holds up. But....

They're all harmless. Just minor nuisances we wouldn't even notice if there weren't so many of them. They're kind of goofy, but there's no punchline.

Punchline. Man, does that have a nasty double-meaning here or what? I can't think of anything he'd be trying to accomplish though, other than chaos.

I'd say that chaos is an underwhelming goal, but he seems to be doing a pretty good job at it.

Damnit! It's not like we got any proof of it, but... grrr, what's he planning, running us ragged like this?! Why doesn't he just come out and face us himself so I can give him the thumping he deserves?!

I told you he'd be hard to catch. If this is the Joker's work, then this definitely isn't all there is to it. Try not to stretch yourself too thin, Tiger, we need to be ready for whatever might come next.

[Tiger? That's Kotetsu's handle? Now that he thinks about it, it would make sense that they'd use pseudonyms, since they're superheroes and all...]

Hey, remember you guys aren't alone in this. If you manage find a sample of anything suspicious or evidence to a brainwashing medium or whatever, let me know. I can analyze it at the Labs and then we'll have a better idea what the hell's going on with these people.

Ugh, fine. I'll do what I can, I guess. This clown is such a pain in the ass.

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