Bug Hunt

[prodigious-mage.livejournal.com]

[action, for Hiroshi and others within the vicinity of the bakery]
[Whenever Hiroshi arrives at the SuperSugarHappyFunWhatever Bakery, he will hear the sounds of screams, explosions, and flames.  ...But don't be too concerned.  The screams are 'haha!' rather than 'auuuugh!'  Whenever he gets downstairs, he'll be treated to the sight of Palom running about playing Whack-A-Cockroach with his staff.  ...He looks pretty happy with himself.]

Wow!  I think they actually got bigger 'cause I took so long to get around to it...

[Others nearby may wish to investigate the noise as well.]

[phone, public]
I've got a question!

So, um, if there are bugs crawling around in say, food supplies and that kind of thing, and if, maybe, you were supposed to kill them and you forgot because you were attacked by an evil house and then giant blue demon things that're gonna haunt you in your sleep forever, and then the bugs grew massive and they laid tons of eggs everywhere and it's possible that people might not have noticed when they were making the food and so you think maybe people might've - might have - eaten food with giant bugs and bug poop and bug parts in it and you kinda feel bad about the whole thing, so you're thinking about what you should do, the right thing to do would be to warn everyone about what might maybe could've possibly very slightly possibly happened, right?

...I'm just saying, if you've had any cupcakes or pie or cake or stuff like that in the last week, you might want to go see a White Mage.  ...Maybe.  Possibly.  You know, if you feel like it.

Comments

[bishonenbunny.livejournal.com]

That would be "hypothetically".

[Tentatively poking his pastries. He's not looking in them, oh no, he is not risking this.]

[prodigious-mage.livejournal.com]

Right, right.

Definitely not 'definitively'. Or 'very importantly'.

[bishonenbunny.livejournal.com]

But why bring up that specific situation? It's rather unlikely.

[Okay, he's getting a little too paranoid here, but who cares, it's possible that there are parts of dead bugs in his newly-bought groceries and he is going to avoid that particular bakery for weeks to come.

It's a waste of money, really, but safety comes first. He throws the pastries into the trash.]

[prodigious-mage.livejournal.com]

Oh. You know. You never know what could happen here. Everyone loses their memories! Everyone gets attacked by giant blue demons! Everyone gets bug poop in their food!

It's definitely possible.

[bishonenbunny.livejournal.com]

[Bug poop.

Oh, god. Where is the sanitizer?]

I'm sure they keep something to prevent bugs from getting into the food, though.

[But he is still going to wash his hands as thoroughly as humanly possible. And then he's going to sanitize his apartment.

Nope, no paranoia here.]

[prodigious-mage.livejournal.com]

Oh, yeah. I definitely dumped a lot of bug spray all over the food that was left when it was all over with.

[...]

I mean, I would have if this was a real thing that happened instead of being that word you said.

[bishonenbunny.livejournal.com]

...you what?

[Now he really counts himself lucky he didn't eat those pastries.]

[prodigious-mage.livejournal.com]

Nothing. Nothing happened. Nothing I did, anyway.

[bishonenbunny.livejournal.com]

You dumped bug spray on the food. There are other ways to get rid of them.

[Like, say, throwing out the food and getting new ingredients.]

[prodigious-mage.livejournal.com]

I did not. ...Bug spray's just the closest thing to call it besides magic since you wouldn't understand.